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IBC Women’s Blog January 11, 2019

IBC Women’s Blog January 11, 2019

36 Years of Marriage By Jodie Montgomery

Happy Anniversary to me! I think there are many that celebrate anniversaries at the first of the year (Terri F.…). I trust it isn’t just about simplifying tax write-offs…or the result of a Happy New Year….

I should have great advice for marriage after 36 years and now a sweet, fun relationship with my best friend and hubby, but I hesitate to write any advice. Love is an act of the will and so yes, we may discipline our wills, and work through a marriage check list as we right our expectations for one another, but there is an aspect of marriage that is just miraculous overcoming. At the heart of overcoming is faith, faith in the ultimate goodness of God.

There is much in life that can just be wearying and frustrating. It takes faith in Him to forgive, to accept another’s forgiveness of my atrocities and craziness, to persevere, to grieve unmet expectations, to repent from idol worship, to love, and to receive love. It is so much easier to build walls and to be disappointed about not being perfect or the real center of another’s universe; faith in God redirects us to change and grow rightly.

Marriage is team work. That’s why it’s important for husband and wife to engage in counseling when marital struggles engulf the home. Believing in the team is critical, as is knowing that the values of home, worship, thankfulness, and caring are worth all the necessary training. In marriage, I’m getting schooled on communication, nursing, being one and yet two, sharing, and celebrating life. The list goes on. I’ve learned to be jealous for my man, my home, and our hopes together. I’ve learned to overcome the world, expectations, and life stretched to0 thin.

Marriage doesn’t end loneliness. We all remain single before God in many moments. God is the Omnipresent companion with a home reserved for His children. Psalm 68:6 “God makes a home for the lonely; He leads out the prisoners into prosperity, only the rebellious dwell in a parched land.” But in a lifetime companion, there is opportunity to represent the love of God through a home, a family. A godly home can help many overcome feelings of loneliness.

I sometimes fight with my husband. I realize that my angst is typically over me feeling so desperately passionate about something and perceiving that we don’t care about the same things. I have told him that he has the emotional range of a wall. I expect him to figure out a way to make it all better. Go to it, man! Going steady must mean, he steadies me even when I prefer otherwise. It must mean hearts uniting in one direction. I have overcome guilt for my irrational moments and the belief that love requires him to totally get me.

Some celebrate big anniversaries with trips abroad or ornate diamonds. I hope to have a Hallmark movie and some great appetizers. Romance is recommitting to have faith in one another and our home. It is remembering that we love because He first loved us. I know of many that have lost a spouse and grieve. They challenge me to overcome the petty things in life and to appreciate the one you are with in the moment. I thank God for my husband of 36 years and pray we will continue to overcome in Him.

Hosea 3:1 Then the Lord said to me, “Go again, love a woman who is loved by her husband, yet an adulteress, even as the Lord loves the sons of Israel, though they turn to other gods and love raisin cakes.”